just come out here and I will go home with you...
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I love you. Go after that dick
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
