I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
