I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize