I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Randomize
