Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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