I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Randomize
