Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize