I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
