Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
