My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
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