i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize
