11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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