Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
