i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
How does one acquire holy water?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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