Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
