I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I want to be your penis for a week.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
