Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Randomize
