i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
where are you?
Hypothermia
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
