i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
