I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
