You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
