Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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