I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize
