I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
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