im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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