What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
