I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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