Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
