The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
