youre lurking in front of me
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
My pussy is not your playground.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Randomize
