New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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