Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
