I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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