Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
no, he came in my armpit
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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