smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
