Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
