after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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