So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
this hospital has no fireball
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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