One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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