So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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