I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
