I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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