Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
God gave him joint rollers for hands
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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