just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize