I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
