sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
wow bdsm is so cute
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
