i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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