you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
