Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
