your parents love me but you hate me
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
